When to Pick a Name?

Q: Why do some Jewish folks refuse to discuss names of children before they are born?

A:  There are some who will also not set up a crib, wallpaper the babies room or even buy diapers in advance.

The actual reason why many refuse to make overt preparations for a child’s arrival is not attributable to one single source.

For the superstitious, discussing the child’s name or getting ready for the birth is tantamount to inviting disaster. Any discussion of a positive event might invite the evil eye or spirits, which might bring disaster to the anticipated event. As Joshua Trachtenberg observes, “the essential character things and of man resides in their names. Therefore, to know a name is to be privy to the secret of its owners being and a master of his fate.”

There is another, more rational, explanation for refraining from advanced planning. As one can never know the state of health or life of an unborn child, assuming that all will be well may create an extraordinarily painful time if events do not turn out as expected.  Scientific tests of ultrasound or amniocentesis are liable to be misleading. At best, they cannot foretell what will occur to the child following birth.

To make elaborate preparations for a child’s entry into the world may be creating an atmosphere that can shatter the couple’s life afterward. And empty crib can be devastating.