On Marriage

Q: Is it obligatory for a bride to wear a veil?

A:  The custom of wearing the veil dates back to the Torah where Rebekah wore a veil when she saw her future husband, Isaac, for the first time. Throughout the ages the tradition of donning a veil has become virtually cemented in Jewish ritual practice.

Another fascinating episode featured in the Torah was when the bride and a groom did not see each other.  Married in darkness they wed the wrong person!  Jacob married Leah instead of Rachel.  It is for this reason that the veil is always lifted before the wedding takes place.

Q: My mother recently remarried.  Her new husband was married before too bit never bothered to obtain a Get (Jewish divorce).  I want him to stand with me under the Huppah at my wedding.   Is this acceptable?

A:  There are very few rules governing who could stand at the Huppah. Obviously, your stepfather made a mistake when he did not receive the Get. He is not legally divorced from his first marriage or for that matter; he is not married the second time in the eyes of Jewish Law. Nonetheless, even though he erred in not getting the Get this would not impede from standing with you at your marriage.

Q: A friend of mine is an artist and wants to design the ketuba -- Jewish marriage document -- which we would love. Would it be valid?

A:  There is no objection to your friend designing and writing the Ketubah. In fact, until very recent times, all Ketubahs were hand written and beautifully ornamented. There are many striking examples of illuminated Ketbot which are priceless heirlooms and valuable collectors items.

Of course, your friend should consult her Rabbi to make sure she has the correct wording and phraseology used in this document.

Many local artists and ones you can find online have created beautiful works of art which are readily available everywhere.